I usually look back at easter & how Jesus was treated & I am honestly really upset at the way people treated Jesus. Too often I point the finger at people who killed Him, rejected Him, & denied Him… & I think – HOW COULD THEY DO THAT!?!? I think about people like Judas Iscariot as the worst of the worst.. & then I realize I AM JUDAS.

How many times have I betrayed Jesus… Promising Him my loyalty in one moment & then in the very next – selling Him out for the sake of what I selfishly want instead?

How many times have I planned to do things my way & I chose to not surrender to Him – I was selling out for what I wanted more than Jesus… How many times have I rejected His love, His free gift of peace or joy – & in its place I chose anxiety, fear, worry, & depression. How many times have I betrayed Him? – The answer is daily.

I know what Jesus has done for me, I know how much He loves me… & yet the list of ways I sell out is endless. I revert to my own way of thinking, acting, & being. I find myself choosing to be angry or I become envious of someone else, I even hold grudges, & I knowingly choose to turn toward (MY WAY) – which is sin… instead of turning to Jesus – who is the TRUTH!

& while I wonder how Jesus could still love someone like Judas – I can’t help but wonder how He could still love me… Judas messed up by betraying Jesus, even when he PERSONALLY knew Jesus’ love, he saw His power in action – & Judas had intimately understood Jesus’ compassion, & yet he betrayed Jesus, he caused his death. & all the while – I am sitting here trying to accept the fact that I am Judas. I am just like him… & maybe you can see how you in fact, are just like Judas, too… I cannot speak for you, but think about this:

Every time we fail to love like Jesus He has loved us, we step into betrayal. I am Judas.

Every time we allow or pass by people who are suffering – we betray Him. I am Judas.

Every time we choose our way & pride instead of Gods way, we deny him. I am Judas.

Every time we react in anger or hatred & we don’t choose to forgive, we betray him. I am Judas.

& here is the AMAZING THING – God knew that I would choose myself & my way over Him… throughout my life & yet JESUS chose to love me even still. & He chooses to love you too!